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Recent Movie Reviews

105 Movie Reviews

Ahead of its time. yeah there wasnt really lip syncing and not a lot happened visually but for 2003 this is pretty good right?

So good... the logic line had me cracking up, perfect small talk non sequitur really threw me off guard

omg didnt the newrgounds logo change color a bit when you hovered on it, was there an easter egg on that screen? as awkward as this is it always gave me confidence to have veins, great work

Recent Game Reviews

52 Game Reviews

You the man now dawg! I liked the theme and story and art it all went together really well and made the confusion of the gameplay seem to make sense and match especially tied together by the BSOD screen which is a great way to trick the player into fucking up which key they want to press. at first hitting q and a for slide and the answers to questions was really fucking me up and the BSOD fucks you up more but its good to have someting like that really confuse you. I have to say I understand why people are confused as fuck but I found it fun even though I did have to play a long ass time to beat it the first time, I wish the timer was on in retrospect because I feel like it took me thirty minutes as not knowing what hitting what things / getting hit does to the meter means, going down to 20% and then almost all the way back up which is emphasized by some instances of double spawn death, glitch into the side of a platform while sliding and one or two times i even slide moved and got stuck outside of the screen on the left side probably bolstered out by a paltform or something? the weird thing is the necronomicon theme made me feel like the more glitches there were the better, the BSOD being slightly meta atleast to the extent of the players computer made me feel like the confusion was supposed to be there.

I think the confusion definitely got fucking aggravating when I started wanting to hit the 3 minute medal and was confused what did what. I eventually had to focus and realize I couldnt punch the heart bubbles and for awhile I thought I had to run into the skull bubbles and the heart bubbles. I think the first thing after realizing how to beat the game that sped my play up a lot was using the slide like a tech maneuver by jumping and sliding over onto the long platform constantly where I knew I had space and using that to speed up as far as I could but I still couldnt hit even 5 minutes so I kept playing and playing. getting like 3 and a half minutes and then getting an 8 or 9 minute run after that is so fucking annoying!! lmfao. eventually I could do them all under 5 minutes and I found out the jump slide tech where you jump and slide at the same time so that you get thrown in the air at around a 45 degree angle diagonally, perfect for some tight spots you encounter in the platform pattern and this was necessary to learn and something i didnt figure out for awhile.

I got a 3 minute run but because I had selected one of the girls specifically I think it didn't give me the medal at first. I could have actually just fucked up and not turned speed mode on for all I know but I think the timer was there so this might be a real thing, hard to say when you played it like 50 fuckin times. Eventually getting down to 2 minute area times was exciting but i realized i had something wrong and i found out you have to punch the skull word bubbles, touch the heart ones, and i also realized i had to stop spammin the diagonal slide invincible tech because it was slower than just going straight up, even though thats riskier. this was a pretty cool game and the mixture of the questions and platforming hectic chaos was really really cerebral and hooked me in and got me to passionately play it for a while. Would love to see something like this expanded and be made even more confusing and have more questions that you have to really focus more on to answer or something like that, like maybe a math question or history mode or some ridiculous and evilly insanely punishing shit like that.

Anyways all that being said, its too confusing to be developed into something that you would sell like on the steam marketplace as is but I think it would be easy to add some things to the tutorial that outline the details of what is happening during the gameplay,and you would probably have to make the controlsand movement feel prettier and smoother so any random person would immediately feel like oh this is fun i get it even though i like the way this all chaotically matches the theme. also kinda curious what the original form of this was before people started reviewing and some changes were made. sick game, probably a really good team because there seemed to be a lot of chemistry with the final product

This is really cool and the atmosphere and feel of all the little shops is awesome. Love the little dumpster area in the alley behind the bar and also love the cheap cocaine hard drugs sign. the way the music changes in different areas and buildings is also really awesome

the hint in the comment was necessary i think which is kind of funny because its atari style and back then it was all about the manual and the game being two things you needed to play the game. before i read the hint i was like wtf and it was honestly maddening in a sick and ironic way to watch a meditation game called its not a race clearly be a weird futile race. then i realized your bar expands and it was fun and tricky to try and time the bar expansion because ur dude slows down as you age, this also serves as a great metaphor for just energy metabolisms. have to laugh hard at people who cant process the metaphor and see the game as more of a message than " a fun game" but I do agree the atari style can make you wish the game was more and had more features, my personal desire was to time it right and then watch my guy walk off the screen as if there was some kind of objective you earn by timing it just right. it's kind of funny because that goes to show that the lives of the dudes who died struggling were essentially the same as the one who made it all of the way to the end, just pacing yourself got you to see cooler shit and increased your abilities. as always meditation messages and themes about life will frustrate people. I think this stands alone as a good game but it would be awesome to see this modified and expanded upon as a new game with extra features so its more play oriented than about the message

Recent Audio Reviews

81 Audio Reviews

The eggs style intro reminded me almost a little of adventure time, which is nice, i mean if youre familiar you might know what elements remind me of it, not meant as anything but a compliment or simple comparison in style. This is good but at times felt a little harsh. I really liked the helicopter style chopping sound at the end. which is ironic because thats a sort of harsher sound innately but it sounded a little smoother than the section before it for some reason. Also the description is interesting, you should try not to make enemies who will try and trash ur stuff xD

Kelpalots responds:

LOTS OF BACON with those harsher sounds! Thanks for reminding me how video game this was, and how it could reflect. Adventure Time does seem to fit it too. That one episode with the core people and their goddess seems to feel a little unreal with how it seems to just fit!

As for the enemy, he did some major thing on our planet like TNTing a bunch of buildings. He doesn't like the fact he told me so either. I would have been blissfully unaware had he not told me these things. He happens to like to destroy people who are important too. And take all their money and worth. So naturally I DID NOT want an enemy, and he happen to be one, because I had worked hard making a lot of things happen for our planet. It totally destroyed his idea of destroying reality.

as soon as i heard the kick drum I knew I was going to favorite this, really really pushes through the 4th wall in a dynamic and engaging way. kind of wishing as the track goes on that it would have that bouncy dynamic 4th wall breaking feel but it progresses in a really nice way that really lends itself to the melodic quality of the song, i cant take any points off my score for it when its really really well put together still. wish I could give a suggestion to make it grab at me more but I don't know lmao so there's that. the second half's progression is really dreamy and a little more dramatic/epic too which I really like and as that new synth that comes in around 2:40ish starts playing it starts feeling a little more dynamic and engaging and the whole song seems to have built itself up to make this complementary element more clear. anyways i dont know, awesome song would like to hear this on some huge speakers in the woods or something

sampling the thong song is extremely newgrounds, congratulations

Recent Art Reviews

260 Art Reviews

Very cool and unique much love glad to see youre still out here

Thats a really awesome concept for the ng logo and a really cool execution

This is awesome, don't hug me im scared is a classic

Final Boss!!!

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