I was definitely dreaming but cant quite remember where or what was going on. I was helping close up shop somewhere and using the company giant truck. I think there was tons of snow everywhere and getting moved and used for things but none of it was mentioned directly and like dreams do something really creative was going on that i cant remember well enough to actually describe

Reflecting lately and realizing my life is often really uncomfortable and miserable, i can blur it out and cover it up with alcohol but only so much. I have really been considering that i have so much autism adhd depression and anxiety that no matter how hard i try, the struggling against it only makes everything worse. I want to feel slightly happy or normal and im almost 30 now, its just never going to happen for me. The thought of ending everything is scary but sometimes thinking of going on like this forever is much scarier. Im at a point where i dont have a real house / home let alone genuine apartment, im just subletting from someone who has gone insane and become hostile, i can barely even functionally work 3 days a week without falling apart. In a doctors office i generally appear healthy to them and they only ever waste my time. Im really strongly feeling like this world is not for me and i should have listened to warning signs to get out a long time ago. I really dont know what to do and i just kind of wait around for the next lucky streak of mania or moderate distraction and happiness. All the things people ever say about things like this are similar to doctors visits, nice on paper, but a waste of time and an attack on what little time and chances i have left

it is summer time mofo

sup

Shhhh its a secret. New ep of 5 songs just dropped

https://cashlin.bandcamp.com/album/finger-lickin

Check out the tunes

guided by voices buzzards and crows

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=CO1WKsnFeOQ&list=RDANO5lGM9lBU&index=12

Thought i would post some of my music that is on youtube on here

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=LhQcgZ5LPsE&list=OLAK5uy_nu148PHHBPkuKJIvZ9eJiXwl2Pjd61FP0&index=2

So I am going cali sober as a stress response to messing up my health and wallet with drugs. But also I was in denial that I could handle working graveyard shifts, so I seek a new job after collapsing at work and being toted away in a motherfucking ambulance … i was working graveyard for a year straight almost ….

A million thoughts race through my head and the stress was making me act like i was almost having seizures of some kind … i need to do my taxes .. the gas bill last month slaughtered me … can i even afford to live in this city? I need to run home to upstate new york and live in my girlfriends basement …no, i need a day job here and a cheaper apartment … no they will all be the size of closets … so i have come to the conclusion that i have a million propositions for myself and the world and people around me and all i really know is i need to stay healthy, keep working, and somehow, do my fucking taxes ….

weirdly the best decision i made was buying this 30 case of beer and just fucking relaxing… so now i can keep my thoughts straight and try to unfuck myself ….

took a bus to see this boss beeyotch!

do you have any crazy bus stories

yall like my hemorrhoid hat? Yall like my crazy ass gear what yall up to? Its craY how time flies. Better appreciate life while we still got it yo

Hey check out this fucked up insane new album with some of the most fucked up hilarious obnoxious rap lyrics ever

https://cashlin.bandcamp.com/album/psychofantasyrap

<iframe style="border: 0; width: 350px; height: 786px;" src="https://bandcamp.com/EmbeddedPlayer/album=3464059669/size=large/bgcol=ffffff/linkcol=2ebd35/transparent=true/" seamless><a href="https://cashlin.bandcamp.com/album/psychofantasyrap">PSYCHOFANTASYRAP by Cashlin</a></iframe>

Yeah also if someone could get this shit to embed? Or does it not work for bandcamp on here? Idk.

[bandcamp width=350 height=786 album=3464059669 size=large bgcol=ffffff linkcol=2ebd35]